I am man, and I am animal

Finally got my 18 horse lawn tractor and plastic tub trailor today. The yard
looks great. After assembling everything at 9 this morning, I spent the
entire day preparing the grounds for the winter (that's two acres, and a
solid 8 hour day of riding, raking, shoveling debris, and dumping).

What does this have to do with astronomy?

One of the things I use to enjoy as an outdoors kind of guy years ago was
laying on my back and looking up. Even as an urbanite, I would make my way
out to a local park or school athletic field, just to lay on my back and
gaze at the stars. In times past, I waxed philosophical in my thoughts, and
contemplated God and aliens alike, wondering about how I got here, what I
was meant to do, and what would happen when I died. You know, is there an
after life and all that.

After seven years of seeking answers to the philisophical questions, I
finally concluded that in the here and now there's more to do and accomplish
than seeking my source for direction and meaning. It was time to pack up my
emotional baggage, catalog it, and store it in the attic, possibly for some
future self exploration, should I feel the need to revisit it.

So I picked up my pencils, and my notebooks and headed off to college. There
I studied computer science and fortunately, in hindsight, I was also
required to take physics, calculus, and humanities. Among these seemingly
obscure and meaningless things to learn as a computer science major, the
subject of physics and sociology has had a lasting impact on me that I have
grown to appreciate. This completed for me a line from physics in technology
to technology in society, and having done so, I felt I had found my place,
my direction and meaning. The "divine" source that remained elusive and
silent, yielded to the human source of knowledge and discovery.

Anyway, so here I am at the end of the day, the last trailor load dumped,
the sun setting and my body wearied. I put the tractor away, and went out to
the back acre to take one last look at my work, and decided to sit for a
moment on the ground. Well, before you know it, I'm laying back and looking
up at the sky. Mars is clearing the trees in the southeast and Vega and
Deneb appear, it's early November and the summer triangle is over head at
5:30PM local time.

The earth smells both like fresh dirt and freshly cut hay. Not the smell of
the hay to be bailed, but the smell of the cut at the ground, and after
about 15 minutes of waiting for stars and staring through the oncoming
twilight, I roll over and push myself up on hands and knees. I am a four
legged creature; maybe I'm a wolf, or a deer. I take a deep breath and drink
in the wonderful smell of the earth, trimmed, loved, and open before me. It
hits me: I am man, and I am animal. I live here on the dirt. It sustains me,
and it is my source of life, and my final place of rest.

As I walk back to the house some 300 feet away, I think to myself, I wish I
could stay out here day and night among the trees and the dirt and the grass
of the field, and bask in the pleasure of being. When I get into the house
and down to dinner, I look over to my wife and I say, "I have my piece of
earth, and I am in heaven".

Afterwards I hesitantly turn on the television and click my way around to
find the Discovery channel doing a piece on amateur model rocketry. After a
half hour or so I reach over and grab the laptop to check up on SAA and see
if I have any email of interest. The moon is full and its 20 degrees (F)
outside. After a long day in the sunshine and fresh cold air, it's both good
and dissapointing to be inside and surrounded by technology.

Stephen Paul
Shirley, MA