Finally we're rid of Ed Conrad

Famous discoverer blown to bits in freak accident
1 post by 1 author
me (Mistakes Happen change)
11:33 AM (less than a minute ago)
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THIS JUST IN
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MAHANOY CITY, Pa.(Rueters) --
A mysterious explosion has taken
the life of the greatest discoverer
the world has ever known.
Ed Conrad was blown to bits
when he turned on the ignition
of his 1980's car this morning.
A preliminary investigation
was unable to pinpoint the cause
but FBI and police theorize that
it may not have been an accident
because Ed indeed had a few enemies.
"Whether it was an accident
or Ed was murdered, we can't say
yet," a Schuylkill County detective
told Sean "Ins" Hannity of Fox
News. "All we can be sure of is
that Ed art in Heaven."
Law enforcement theorizes
that the gas in Ed's tank may
have contained too much ethanol.
Police released this brief
list of Ed's possible enemies
whom they will interrogate:

The Smithsonian
American Anthropological Association
American Association of Physical Anthropologists
American Board of Forensic Anthropology
American Society of Primatologists
American Academy of Forensic Sciences
The British Academy
Institute of Human Origins
The Leakey Foundation
Palaeo-anthropology Society
University Departments (Brainwashing101)
Department of Anthropology, University of Arizona
School of Human Evolution & Social Change (formerly Department of
Anthropology) Arizona State University
Anthropology at Berkeley, University of California, Berkeley
Department of Anthropology, University of California, Los Angeles
Anthropology at UCSD, University of California, San Diego
Department of Anthropology, University of California, Santa Barbara)
Department of Anthropology, University of Chicago
Department of Anthropology, Columbia University
Department of Anthropology, Cornell University
Ph.D. Program in Anthropology, CUNY
Department of Biological Anthropology and Anatomy, Duke University
Department of Anthropology, University of Florida
Department of Anthropology, Harvard University
Anthropology @ UIUC, University of Illinois
Anthropology Department, Indiana University
Department of Anthropology, Johns Hopkins University
Department of Anthropology, University of Michigan
Department of Anthropology, New York University
Department of Anthropology, University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill
Anthropology: at the University of Pennsylvania
Department of Anthropology, University of Pittsburgh
Department of Anthropology, Princeton University
Center for Human Evolutionary Studies (Rutgers University)
Department of Anthropological Sciences, Stanford Unversity
Department of Anthropology, University of Texas
Department of Anthropology, University of Virginia
Department of Anthropology, University of Washington
Department of Anthropology, University of Wisconsin, Madison

Archaeological Institute of America
Association for Feminist Anthropology
Association of Black Anthropologists
Association of Latina and Latino Anthropologists
Human Biology Association
Paleo-anthropology Society
Society for American Archaeology
Society for Historical Archaeology
Society for Archaeological Sciences
Society for Applied Anthropology
Society for Economic Anthropology

UNITED STATES (REGIONAL)
Northeastern Anthropological Association
Eastern States Archaeological Federation
Council for Northeast Historical Archaeology
Archaeological Society of Connecticut
Maine Archaeological Society
Massachusetts Archaeological Society
New Hampshire Archeological Society
New York State Archaeological Association
Vermont Archaeological Society

INTERNATIONAL ANTHROPOLOGY ORGANIZATIONS
International Union of Anthropological and Ethnological Sciences
Canadian Sociology and Anthropology Association
Societe canadienne de sociologie et d'anthropologie
Canadian Archaeological Association
Canadian Anthropology Society
Royal Anthropological Institute (UK)
Association of Social Anthropologists of U.K. and the Commonwealth
European Association of Social Anthropologists
Association of Social Anthropologists of Aoteaora / NewZealand
Council for British Archaeology
Society for Industrial Archaeology
Society of Africanist Archaeologists

talk.origins
alt.atheism
talk.atheism
sci.bio.paleontology
sci.bio.evolution
sci.anthropology.paleo
sci.archaeology.mesoamerican
sci.geo.geology
sci.geo.mineralogy

Conrad, who many in science
had long considered a Looney Tune,
discovered petrified human bones
between anthracite coal veins that
have proven beyond all doubt that
the theory of man's evolution is
a total farce.

MAN AS OLD AS COAL
http://groups.google.com/group/alt.f...2305f02e955b66
http://www.edconrad.com

If that wasn't enough, the
Ignorant Prick then came up with
the undeniable truth that you
really aren't dead when you die
-- and that the Supreme Bean is
a very nice Guy, even though you
can't see His face

http://www.edconrad.org

This is a recent FBI file photo
of Ed (and I'm sure we all agree
that he looked like a dead ringer
for a very young, handsome Clark
Gable).

http://www.edconrad.com/pics/Dartboard.jpg

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THESE CRAPPY POEMS WERE FOUND IN ED'S POCKET

GREAT BALLS OF FIRE

Ed's dead, you said!
I hope it's true!
It's time for celebration.
He's squeezed our balls
'Til black and blue
And I've run out of medication.

http://www.vrimples.com/images/Scrot..._Shankbone.jpg

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CRIME IN RHYME

Evolutionists, their interests SO vested,
And Poor Truth, for too long molested
Their deceit and deception
Near the point of perfection
If it were my call, they'd ALL be arrested.

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TRUTH SERUM
All hail to those Scoundrels of Science
Denying truth with incredible defiance
Their crap they just love
But, of it, they can shove
Although Truth ain't one of their clients

==========

TERSE VERSE
Please excuse me for being SO brash
Calling the Theory of Evolution trash
Even the peudos know well
That their game's but a shell
And soon we can expect it to crash.

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NAP TIME
If physical anthropologists smelled like a rose,
We'd have no reason to clothespin our nose.
But when their integrity is lacking
And Truth has been sent packing
We can either fight them or continue to doze.

============

SMELLS LIKE HELL
The pseudos, right at home in the sewers
Seeking truth, they're don't-ers, not do-ers.
May they go to their grave
With a giant stinkin' wave
PHEW! Their stench will linger past New Year's

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VERMIN SQUIRMIN'
Look what's happened to our Halls of Learnin'
More proof added that we're filled with vermin.
Ed's keeps putting nails in their coffin
They try like hell but just can't stop 'im.
They're scared stiff, and it's why they're squirmin'

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MOANS OF THE CLONES
As expected, they'll be more grunts and groans
Whenever they're challenged by petrified bones
The pseudos sure know
That their theory ain't so
Yet detest being called Establishment Clones
..
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WHAT'S THAT SMELL I SMELL?
The anthros, with interests so vested
And Poor Truth, for so long detested.
Their deceit and deception
Near the point of perfection
Their integrity? Supremely infested!