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On Jun 27, 3:17 am, "Tom Potter" wrote:
"Friendly Neighborhood Vote Wrangler" wrote in .com... music"Also Sprach Zarathustra" http://youtube.com/watch?v=pZqp79FOJB0 /music Ladies and gentlemen, by the authority vested in me by the Overseer of Kooks & Trolls in AFA-B, I present the winners of the Spring 2007 alt.fan.art-bell Awards. The envelopes, please! music"X-Files Theme" http://youtube.com/watch?v=t5KJJ83MQUg /music ANGSTROM AWARD AND MEDAL The winner is...GREYSKY! 09 votes YES 00 votes NO 03 votes abstain Congratulations, Greysky! Gotten any signals yet on that faster-than- light radio of yours? CHERNOBYL PRIZE The winner is...GERALD NEWTON! 09 votes Gerald Newton 01 votes Linda Gore 00 votes Neither of the above 02 votes abstain Congratulations, G-Dolf! How many groups did you melt down in that Kevin Cannon /doesn't/ read? CLEOPATRA AWARD The winner is...MICHAEL "HOWDY/TRUMPETOFTHELORD" SCHMIDT! 10 votes YES 00 votes NO 02 votes abstain Congratulations, Howdy! Which are you most in denial about, that you're a closet case, that you're not good looking any more, that you suck as a trumpet player, or that people dislike your poasts so much that they LARTed your Google Groups account and succeeded? DR. POSTMAN'S "STOLEN KIDNEY" AWARD The winner ! 08 votes YES 00 votes NO 04 votes abstain Congratulations, paranoid religious spammer! Have you looked anywhere and /not/ found the Number of the Beast? ED CONRAD "BRAIN OF STONE" AWARD The winner is...HONEST JOHN AKA CLOCKBRAIN! 11 votes YES 00 votes NO 01 votes abstain Congratulations, Clockbrain! You won the award for being an incorrigible clueproof idiot by the largest margin on this ballot. Does that mean anything to you? Probably not, or you wouldn't have won this award. GREEN LANTERN AWARD FOR PROJECTION The winner is...HONEST JOHN AKA CLOCKBRAIN! 07 votes Honest John AKA Clockbrain 04 votes Michael "Howdy/TrumpetoftheLord" Schmidt 01 votes Neither of the above 00 votes abstain Congratulations a second time, Clockbrain! So, would you really stab your friends in the back the way you allege Art Deco did to Phineas? SIR ROBIN AWARD FOR BRAVERY The winner is...TOM POTTER! 07 votes Tom Potter 04 votes Nightbat 00 votes Neither of the above 01 votes abstain Congratulations, Crackpotter! Your instructions for how to go real-life on your adversaries were enough to catapult you ahead of one of the more notorious poast-editors participating in AFA-B. STEVE WINTER MEMORIAL "STEAMING MOUND OF HYPOCRISY" The winner is...ANDREW B. CHUNG! 09 votes Dr. Andrew B. Chung 03 votes Michael "Howdy/TrumpetoftheLord" Schmidt 00 votes Neither of the above 00 votes abstain Congruatulations, Double-Doctor! Your hypocrisy is legendary! THICK AS A BRICK AWARD The winner is...NOBODY! Pedro Sanchez 04 votes YES 03 votes NO 05 votes abstain I see people didn't follow Napoleon Dynamite's advice--they didn't vote for Pedro. While he did win a plurality, he didn't win by 2/3 of the yes/no votes, so he didn't win the award. TINFOIL STAR AWARD The winner is...GERALD NEWTON! 05 votes Gerald Newton 03 votes Angela Kahealani. 03 votes Mike "miguel" Cranston 00 votes None of the above 01 votes abstain Congratulations, again, G-Dolf! Your attempts to shut down Databasix and Insurgent.org, as misguided as they were, did earn you something--a repeat of this award for frivolous, misguided, and futile netkkkopping. OFFICE OF THE VIAGRA JUNKIE The winner is...MICHAEL "HOWDY/TRUMPETOFTHELORD" SCHMIDT! 07 votes Michael "Howdy/TrumpetoftheLord" Schmidt 04 votes Raymond Karczewski 00 votes Neither of the above 01 votes abstain Congruatulations, Howdy! You managed to finally unseat one of the most prolifically limp poasters on USENET. Now we (tinw) know that you must use that hand lotion for things other than moisturizing! OFFICE OF THE WICKED WITCH The winner is...TOM POTTER! 10 votes Tom Potter 01 votes Joseph Bartlo 00 votes Neither of the above 01 votes abstain Congratulations again, Crackpotter! Your state of perpetual threatening meltdown won you an office. Enjoy your tenure! This concludes the announcement of the winners of the Spring 2007 alt.fan.art-bell awards. Thirteen entities submitted 13 ballots. One ballot was disqualified on the basis of its caster being a disenfranchised notorious net-kook. Consequently, twelve ballots were considered to be from qualified voters and were counted. Look for the call for nominations for the Summer AFA-B awards around Labor Day, although nominations will be accepted before then. The elections should be scheduled so that the winners will be announced about the time of the Autumnal Equinox. Until then, enjoy! music"Happy Trails to You" http://youtube.com/watch?v=zVgkcW0luc0 /music -- Co-FNVW of AUK Acting Pollmaster of alt.fan.art-bell AUK Extra-Curricular Activities & Special Ballots http://www.screedbomb.info/goti/ -- As can be seen from the post above, a few anonymous bigots and sociopaths, some motivated by race, religion and politics, and some operating out of boiler rooms, are hard at work, trying to control the flow of information on the Internet, Very few, wasn't it, Tom. Only 12 voters. And that includes ah, who we thought was our friend. Double-A |
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